


Trapped (between god and goldfish)

by ladygray99



Category: Numb3rs
Genre: Community: numb3rswriteoff, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Episode Tag, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-23
Updated: 2010-01-23
Packaged: 2017-10-06 14:16:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladygray99/pseuds/ladygray99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Don goes looking God and finds goldfish.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trapped (between god and goldfish)

**Author's Note:**

> post-ep Magic Show

Don sat in Bradford's office studying his hands, tracing the swirls of his fingerprints with his eyes, wondering if Larry could overlay them on cosmic swirls, stars for identification points.

"What are you thinking about Eppes?" Bradford asked after long minutes of silence filling the room.

"Lot of things."

"Such as?"

"God, sledgehammers, the paradoxical nature of an all inclusive universe...goldfish."

"God and goldfish?"

"I took your advice, went looking for something more."

"Where'd you go looking?"

"Temple. Went to temple. Haven't been in years. Talked to the rabbi. Haven't done that since I was a kid. Wanted to know if God could help with my batting average."

"How'd that go?"

"Hit .270 that summer."

"The talk with the rabbi?"

"It was...interesting."

"What did you talk about?"

"God. Goldfish." Don fell silent again. He didn't know how to explain the odd ended feelings swishing around his brain. "This last case, I got to the scene before the coroner could pull the body out of the tank. I kept looking at this woman floating there, underwater. The Amazing Talma. She didn't look dead. I kept expecting her eyes to pop open like some horror movie. For her to start pounding on the glass. I couldn't breathe for a moment looking at her, felt like my lungs were fully of water, had to get out of there."

"Do you often empathize with victims that way?"

"No." Don answered flatly. "I've been talking to Larry lately."

"About?"

"God."

"Goldfish?"

"That came later. Higgs-Boson. God particle. It's what he's hunting for. A little speck of matter, energy that'll explain it all to him." Don leaned forward. "He said that all of his high end science, math says that the entire universe had to have been cast into existence by an external observer."

"God"

"Problem. Same fancy science says the universe in all inclusive and there can be nothing external of it."

"Well that must keep Larry up at night."

Don closed his eyes and raised his arms. "I've had this weird feeling lately. I feel like if I could just stretch a little more I'll be able to touch the edge of my all inclusive universe, run my fingers along the glass." Don dropped his arms. "I'm adding all these things to my life. Family, girlfriend, therapy...God. It doesn't feel like my universe is getting bigger, the bowl is just getting more crowded."

"You can't breathe?"

"Yeah. This guy we arrested, built the magic trick the Amazing Talma drowned in. It would have been a good trick. Roses and goldfish. He tried to get her out. Took a sledgehammer to his own creation, right at the weakest point. I've had the urge the last couple of days to find the structurally weakest point of my little bowl and just take a sledgehammer to it."

"You're not often self destructive Eppes."

"I know. But...I want to find out what's on the other side of the border of the all encompassing universe. Just beak out. Let it all pour out. Won't work though."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm just a gold fish, swimming round and round my little bowl. I break out and I die, I drown in air. Just a goldfish swimming round and round looking for God in all the places I can't breathe."


End file.
